The world is my Rabbi

The term Rabbi is misused and misunderstood more than most other terms. Ask five people to define rabbi and you will likely get five different replies. To me, it just means someone who has a tax-exemption.

What I don’t understand is why someone would need a Rabbi, if he or she can think for himself. I’m not talking about halacha. I’m talking about hashkafa, life-stuff. If it would be a requirement, why don’t Rabbis have Rabbis?

When I was a young kid in elementary school, kids would cheat off me by tests. I didn’t know what to do because I felt it might be wrong but I didn’t want to make any enemies and I definitely didn’t want to tattle (I still look down at tattletales, snitches, canaries and whatever else you want to call them- for the most part). So I asked my parents what’s wrong if I help kids cheat off me, and they answered that later in life they will be used to not having to work/struggle for anything, and they’ll stay with nothing. No hard job, too lazy to solve problems in real-life, etc.

Which brings to mind the universal truth: No pain, no gain. Now how is giving up one’s autonomy to a Rabbi different from cheating on a test? You aren’t going to grow by deferring to another person all your life. You need to think for yourself, to make mistakes, to be independent.

I mean, you can always get perspective and wisdom from anyone and everyone, but to give up your autonomy and decision-making to one person is just stupid to me.






A happy life consists not in the absence, but in the mastery of hardships.-Helen Keller

Dependence

We are all dependent to some extent.

I myself am very independent-minded, but that only makes me realize how dependent I really am. On family, the government, friends, my community (shidduchim), etc. There are certain things which even if they are unpleasant, I have to go through with them at this time for various reasons, but where I can control it – why shouldn’t I? Why do I always go on trips with friends or family? Yes, it’s a lot of fun and a better experience when sharing with others, but that’s only if it isn’t always like that. Therefore, I’ve decided to stop being such a wussy and go away for a Shabbos without dragging anyone along. Eventually, I want to go on a long vacation without anyone I know.

And talking of shaking things up a bit, I want to start going on trips without a camera just to fully experience things. I want to start going on unplanned, unscheduled excursions. I want to start chatting it up with random people on trains and in the street. I want to start trying new foods and eating things that I’ve decided I don’t like years ago. I want to laugh uncontrollably and then sob uncontrollably. I want to just start dancing in the streets or at least skipping. I want to go to a random acquaintance and explain how much of an impact they have on my (and others’) life. I want to approach a close friend in the streets and shout “I love you!” I want to just take a break from life for a week; no talking to anyone I know or accomplishing anything school-related. I want to sing at a strangers Shabbos-seuda.

But will I?



“Like the body that is made up of different limbs and organs, all moral creatures must depend on each other to exist.”